TODAY WAS AWESOME!!!!!!

event: sports day SMK DPM 2009
time: 7am-4.30pm
venue: Stadium Komplex Penampang
involvement: THE WHOLE STUDENTS FROM DPM

it was soooo awesome. and now im like sooo tired. but theres more tomorrow! :D
had Equus[SLR camera] with me so took 500++ pictures. hahaha. i'll upload it soon ait :)
can't wait for tomorrow's day.

i didn't just spent the whole day with my friends and babe, did my 'funnest' hobby, TAKING PICTURES OF PEOPLE WITH THEIR 'MUKA SEMANGAT' WHILE THEY'RE RUNNING AND ECT. ECT.

People I was with the whole time:
-Kiko
-Darren@babe
-Cella
-Vien
-Edna
was with them today. they come and go as they please.

NOW
my legs are like hurting and I didn't even join anything.
"maybe because I was running those stairs -up and down-"

I'm like getting darker maybe cause of the sun and me going under it while taking pictures.
dayem.

well, will upload pictures sooooooon enough :)
maybe tomorrow. so get ready for LOTS and I mean LOTS of pictures :)

Cintha<3

Bye for now :)

Love you baby :)

Stress at 2009

seriously!
but its for my own good right?
trying to think positive people!
i got to study now.
my mom is like so shouting for me to study.
damn! and tomorrow is like our sports day. wtf?!?!
.
.
.
.
.
i hate spm.

OMG OMG OMG

he is sooooo cute! :D this is how i define cute :D
his name is Randolph Permejo. YOUTUBE
i just love his covers.

and this girl. she's sooo adorable :D
name, Cathy Nguyen and she's Vietnamese! :D YOUTUBE

and this guy!! soooo cuteee! :D [im like saying all these things =.="]
name, Gabe Bondoc. YOUTUBE

I can assure u that u'll fall in love with them :D

I've been Youtube'ing a lot

it's true. no life. hahaha.
i should be studying though but its just too addictive! :D
what do I normally watch:

1. video covers [more on to Paramore's]
2. madTV [crazy funny]
3. HappySlip [she's awesome!]
4. watching me and my band over and over again [miss them!]
5. MORE COVER SONGS! :D

i need to get a life =.="

IM ADDICTED TO PARAMORE'S NEW SONG!

it's from their 3rd album. damn!
siok budu! :D


this is Paramore, Ignorance.

A day with my baby :)

He went to the house the other day.
was bored and all.
so took some pictures.
actually there's more but these are just some that I edited :)

Love u baby :)

A day of boredom and not going to school and this is what I do :D

okay. here's the deal.
jasmine borrowed Equus (the slr) and left it at home which on that day I was sick so I didn't went to school.
jeng3. hahaha
I was bored early in the morning so I put on some make-up and started snapping.
hehehehe here's the result! :D
and after editing it:)

THE END :)

I fucked up everything...

for all this while i thought that he was not even trying.
i never think twice. am i that stupid?
of course he did tried his best.
i feel so ashamed.
no way i'm gonna let him go.
i'm afraid if i do, *long puase* i just don't wanna okay.

UPDATES

i got a new youtube account. just click here :)
i also got musicianmatch account. click here :)
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okay imma just let it out.
im sick and tired of his excuses.
the hell with this relationship.
im so damn foolish. wtf am i thinking?!
of course i love him. who doesn't love their boyfriend?
but he got me thinking otherwise.
i have no idea why i always hide it with fake smiles and laughs.
am i that desperate? how pathetic can i be? more i think.
maybe i'm not cut of for him.
he 'needs' someone whom in his eyes are like everything he needs in the world.
even if he tells me that way back when that is.
what the hell does that suppose to mean?
that's just playing cruel.
im expose to heartbreaking-s and sadness for a long time.
because i've been fooled. no shock though.
i've told myself before that this may lead to something awful.
but i never listen to my brain instead i listen to my heart.
that's bad. and now, a slap on the face. none stop slaps.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
'how can u be so stupid cintha? how can u not see this coming?'
'i saw it coming. way before everything starts to fall apart.'
'then why are u still holding on to him?'
'because i wanna see if he can change if i confront him.'
'damn u bitch! how maybe times do u have to see this coming? u like getting hurt?!'
'NO. its just that i love him so much. and i know he loves me too'
'true. but no matter what, he's hurting u. seriously. dump that idiot.'
'i cant! its not that easy to let someone u love so much go just like that.'
'its not about loving him or not. its about letting urself have some pride. he's an idiot who hurts u so much and still calls u his girlfriend. he doesn't see that ur hurting for a long time now.'
'but still...'
'listen to me. anyone will be damn freaking lucky to have u as a girlfriend. ur sweet, caring, loving, faithful and all those crap that people keep telling u. and the best thing is, u're not like other girls. u know whats right and wrong. this relationship just got fucked up. theres nothing u or him can do now to save it cause if he does, it'll be the same all over again.'
'why can't he understand me? my feelings? i know he have problems on his own and im willing to help him and be there for him. but he always pushes me away. i tried to be close to him face to face but his respond was like, im a piece of crap why the hell are u even talking to me?. im so stupid.'
'no ur not. he is. he doesnt see whats on front of him until its gone. he'll regret alright.'
'so u mean i should let him go?'
'no.'
'no? then what should i do?'
'let him be. give him few days or weeks until his doings crack u, then confront him. this time, last chance to set things right. if he doesnt succed just dump him. tell him everything that u've been through to get the relationship work. he deserve a smack on the face too.'
'...'
'i know u can do it. if the relationship doesnt work out, u'll always have me. all the time. 24/7.'
'thanks...'*tears came rolling down her cheeks as she press enter on the keyboard*
------------------------------------------------------------
see what i mean? im my own problem solver and someone to talk to and trust the most.
its hard for me not to think about all this shit.
its right front of my bloody face.
im blind. blind as a ant.
im drown to love at first sight.
until that slap in the face gets really hard then i'll realise.
that's how stupid am i in a relationship.
even if i always be the one to help those in problems.
even if im the one who always keeps the secrets.
my own problem.
sucks to be that person.
'just put it with a fake smile.' fuck it
what does that suppose to mean? 'love'?
those for alphabate. does it have to mean anything?
hope so. HOPE? are u kidding?
hope is just that thing u do when life gives u a lot of hell and thats the only way to make u feel better and not think that ur a piece of crap.
no doubt.
out.

-TRULY-
-cintha rajah-

omfg!

have you ever thought about different people calls u by different name?
i have. this came up to me when i was on the way back from school.
i followed my school bus by the way.
suddenly popped out of my head, and thought that i should blog about it. haha
anyway. these are the list names and who calls me that:
1. baby: mom, dad and boyfriend.
2. jas: closes friends and those who've known me the longest.
3. cintha: those who recently got to know me and those who i told them to call me by that name.
4. intha: dad also, grandparents.
5. jacintha [full name gila!]: cousins, relatives or those who barely know me.

weird right? but i think its cool. somehow. haha. its been awhile since i've update my blog. been so busy with school and preparing for spm. can't wait for it to end. its gonna start on the 18th of november. and end on the 16th of december. although my subjects are like skipping days, but still, it counts. haha. haven't got my shedule yet. anyway, my life have been so boring lately. very. excluded the business. recently finished my Reka Cipta project. FINALLY! it was hard doing it, it was more harder listening to the principal to talk about it. damn. but thank goddness its done. i didn't know that being in form 5 can be so damn hactic. but at the same time its fun. no doubt. i love my class! their so fun to be with. im so gonna miss them after spm :( sad but that's life i guess. hehe.

i'm gonna post some new photos cause i'd rather post pictures then types. idk. too lazy i think :D